It is human nature to need both novelty and stimulation, as well as security. In order to dare to step out of one’s comfort zone and gather new experiences, one needs a certain amount of internal resources, including certainty and stability. The state in which these resources are provided is called the window of affective tolerance.
Learn more about the affective tolerance window and its relationship to emotion regulation. Learn ways to develop your window of tolerance and increase your own emotional stability.
What is the window of affective tolerance?
The window of tolerance is a zone of optimal arousal, neither too high nor too low. It is a state in which we can adaptively and flexibly process stimuli without becoming overwhelmed ornumb1.
The window of tolerance builds on temperament and first experiences with the environment. If our parents soothed us when needed or provided adequate stimulation, we probably developed a wide window of tolerance. Proper emotion regulation is then adequately developed when caregivers soothe the child in moments of excessive arousal (for example, intense anxiety, nervousness) or provide stimulation and activity when arousal is too low (for example, by inviting play or sensory experiences).
A wide window of stress tolerance
When our window of tolerance is wide, it means that we tolerate awide variety of emotional experiences and interpersonal interactions well. They don’t lead to extreme emotional states, unsettling us; we don’t feel that our internal states are overwhelming us. It is relatively easy for us to maintain a sense of security in all kinds of situations; we are not overwhelmed by feelings of insecurity without reason.
Imagine an ordinary day in which you don’t experience much stress. A typical day: work, home, maybe meeting with friends or watching a TV series. Typically, these types of experiences put you in the middle of a window of tolerance. You face nothing but what you can handle. You feel safe and capable.
Suppose a stressor arises, for example, you receive a call from your boss that requires you to do extra work on short notice. Or you stand in traffic and are late for a dental appointment. Such factors, of course, increase the level of agitation, but if you are able to properly regulate and manage these emotions, you will stay within the window of tolerance. Thus, you will be able to manage your stress without getting overly upset, which could potentially affect the subsequent events of the day.
Narrow window of stress tolerance
When our window of tolerance is narrow, our daily experiences can lead us into unmanageable, unsettled states in which many situations seem threatening. When you experience an emerging stressor, such as being late for an important meeting with a client, you may feel intense agitation that affects your behavior. For example, in a meeting you may find it difficult to say anything and focus on the conversation. Your emotions and body will signal danger to you through excessive activity: heartbeat, tightness in the stomach, feeling hot.
Emotional dysregulation, or when we are outside the window of tolerance
A sense of security is not available to us when we are in a state of over- or under-stimulation. It is then extremely difficult to enjoy taking on new challenges, learning complex processes, measuring ourselves against tasks. Both high and low arousal are associated with excessive fear or shame, rather than excitement or relaxation.
When we are outside the window of tolerance, the nervous system goes into fight-or-flight mode. We can fall into a state of over-stimulation, or shut down and fall into apathy.
Hyper-arousal and hyper-arousal
The window of tolerance has an upper and lower limit, which delineates states of excessive physiological arousal, known as hyperarousal, and hyperarousal – too little physiological arousal.
Hyper-arousal is characterized by excessive activation and increased energy. It can manifest as difficulty concentrating, hypervigilance, irritability and constant restlessness. It then becomes troublesome to stop, get in touch with one’s body, and collect thoughts. On the other hand, in states of hyperexcitability, the parasympathetic nervous system is immobilized to conserve energy. This can lead to numbness and a lack of feeling one’s own emotions, which can significantly affect one’s mental health.
Hyper-arousal (over-stimulation):
- an overactive nervous system,
- surge of energy,
- intense emotional reactions,
- disorganized thought processes,
- intrusive thoughts,
- surprising reactions.
Hyperexcitability (insufficient arousal):
- reduced activity,
- lack of energy,
- numbness,
- slow cognitive processing,
- dissociation (separation from physical experiences and emotions).
Psychological trauma vs. window of tolerance
For analyzing our window of tolerance, the topic of past traumas can be very important. Namely, traumatic experiences disrupt our emotional balance and sense of security, causing us to feel fear, confusion, helplessness and even dissociation – even at times when there is no real external threat. This means that even if we are safe now, our body, and especially our nervous system, remembers and relives painful experiences.
During childhood, the width of the window of tolerance is shaped primarily by temperament and environment. The experience of complex trauma (CPTSD) narrows the window of affective tolerance, inhibiting the developmental process and impairing the functioning of the emotional sphere.
A very important aspect of the impact on emotion regulation is the area of attachment and what style of attachment has been experienced. Traumatic experiences can overwhelm the nervous system, which can lead to increased sensitivity and affect the ability to cope with emotions for years to come.
It is worth noting that also in adulthood, traumatic events can temporarily or long-term affect the extent of the affective tolerance window.(Read: post-traumatic stress disorder PTSD).
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Stress tolerance window
It’s never too late to expand your window of tolerance. You can increase it with every resource you develop, with every step in the process of dealing with your past.
Your window widens when you regulate unpleasant states of high arousal (fear, frustration) or low arousal (shame, helplessness).
Your window of affective tolerance also widens when you allow yourself positive emotions: excitement, passion or relaxation, tenderness, calmness.
Emotion regulation depends on the ability to pay attention to our emotional fluctuations. By practicing body awareness, we can learn to recognize when we are in the middle of our optimal arousal zone, or when we are experiencing hyper-arousal or hyper-arousal.
Self-regulation and building our own emotional resilience
The first step to self-regulation is to become aware of our triggers: when do we feel strong or insufficient arousal? In what situations? Then we learn to notice how we react to these factors. What is happening to the body: temperature, heart rate, stomach, hands? Finally – we learn to optimally control our own emotional reactions. How do you manage your reactions? To support yourself in this process and strengthen your own mental resilience, it is worth taking care of the following spheres.
Sleep time
During sleep, the brain has a chance to process the emotional experiences of our day, which can lead to a better understanding and regulation of them. This is why sleep plays such an important role in mental recovery. Good quality sleep can realistically help reduce our stress levels.
Activity time
When we are active, we strengthen our brains in many ways. Exercise, especially moderate intensity exercise, can help reduce stress and tension levels. During physical activity, the body releases endorphins, or happy hormones, which can bring relief and reduce feelings of stress.
Physical activity can also act as a form of discharge of negative energy and frustration, which can help manage anger and irritation.
Focus time
It is a good idea to ensure that you are comfortable working (or any other form of intellectual effort) while focused. Focusing on tasks is a form of active coping, which increases self-efficacy and self-efficacy. An active approach to problems becomes an antidote to feelings of helplessness and frustration.
Fun time
By allowing ourselves to be spontaneous and creative, we release tension. Play can also be a way to get out of one’s comfort zone and lower anxiety levels. Pleasurable play experiences affect overall mood and feelings of contentment. Spontaneous activities can lead to a more flexible approach to life and greater openness to new ideas.
Time to connect
When we interact with people, we learn to appreciate our connection to the world around us. Strong social ties can provide a sense of belonging and security. Experiences lived together with other people build a sense of community in us – herd creatures – and strengthen our ability to cope with emotional difficulties. In a way, they create for us the foundations on which we stand on sure feet, ready to face challenges.
Down time
When we are not focused on any particular goal, and our mind is wandering, perhaps even bored, that’s when we rest most fully. In doing so, we help ourselves recharge our energy and increase our resources, which we will use later, for example, when under strong external stimuli. When the mind is relaxed, it is easier to focus on the present and perceive the situation with greater clarity of thought.
Time for reflection
Conscious reflection enables us to recognize and identify our own emotions. By analyzing our own emotions, we can identify the causes of our reactions. Reflection allows us to gain a broader perspective, as well as gain distance from our own emotions and deepen our understanding of the overall context.
Mindfulness and self-regulation
Mindfulness, also known as attentive awareness or mindfulness, plays a key role in self-regulation. This is because it gives us the ability to:
- enjoying the small things, appreciating the ordinary day when things are going well,
- noticing when our emotions are guiding us; mindfulness helps us calm down,
- to recognize when we have felt threatened, helping to bring us back toward safety.
Working with the body
There are simple physical exercises, the practice of which supports the process of widening the window of tolerance, and therefore – helps to regulate our own emotions and simply deal with them optimally. Below are some examples.
Centering exercise
Place one hand on your heart and place the other on your stomach. Lengthen your spine. Take several full and slow breaths. Notice the fullness of your body, allow yourself to observe your breathing. Inhale, exhale. Check with curiosity what breathing rate is comfortable for you. Accept your breath as it is.
Grounding exercise
Stand in a relaxed position, focus your attention on the sensations in your feet. Move your center of gravity to different areas of your feet: front, back, side. Then bend your knees several times, pulsing your feet gently up and down. Feel the ground under your feet – stable ground. See what positioning, or what movement, enhances the feeling of stability and contact with the ground.
Walking exercises
When you walk, focus all your attention on your body and leave your thoughts far away. Pay attention to how your feet touch the ground, how your knees move. Check your sensations in your hips and shoulders. Practice pushing off with your feet or walking at different speeds and dynamics. Feel the changes in your body depending on which gait you choose.
Remember that each of us can begin the practice of widening our window of tolerance at any point in our lives. Build your inner security and gradually try new things that may still be out of your comfort zone for now. Expand your own window of tolerance, gently, step by step, pushing the boundaries of hyper- and hypo-awakening. Give yourself time and don’t critically evaluate the results.
Bibliography:
Ogden, P., Fisher, J. (2023) Sensorimotor psychotherapy. Interventions in the treatment of trauma and attachment disorders. Kraków: Jagiellonian University Publishing House.
Ogden, P., Minton, K., and Pain, C. (2006). Trauma and the body: A sensorimotor approach to psychotherapy. New York: Norton.
Siegel, D.J. (1999). The developing mind: How relationships and the brain interact to shape who we are. New York; Guilford Press.
Segal, Z. V., Williams, J. M. G., & Teasdale, J. D. (2013). Mindfulness-based cognitive therapy for depression: A new approach to preventing relapse. 2nd Edition. New York: Guilford Press.
https://www.nicabm.com/trauma-how-to-help-your-clients-understand-their-window-of-tolerance/